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littlemissinvisble

It's a bubbly life ^~^

Month

November 2016

insignificance

Sometimes it feels like everything is so insignificant like none of it really matters all that much, that maybe nothing I do really matters. Some people think that’s pretty messed up to think like that, but on the other hand can they really tell me that I’m messed up if they don’t know me? I’m not here to be perfect, I’m here to be real to be genuine. I won’t fake things for anyone I’ll be blunt and prompt. That’s just me though. I think that not everyone likes me but at the same time not everyone matters to me.

I don’t really know what this is about just a rant as per usual I guess. Listening to you only live once by the strokes 10/10 would live once again. There’s this boy who I like and I found out he likes me too so that’s kinda cool I guess 🙂 I don’t know what will come of that but I think if anything we’ll be good friends which is lit. Need some friends in a way. Oh also I met this guy awhile back (different one) I’m gonna call him pear because yeah. Anyways, we’ve been helping each other through our breaks ups and I’m hanging out with him on Sunday I think which should be cool 🙂 he seems genuine and also I don’t know what your guys stance on cigarettes and alcohol is but he’s gonna probably buy some for me cause he’s kinda cool like that. Probably food then a movie. I haven’t seen Dr.strange yet can you guys believe that omg I’m super deprived. I think the stance I’ve taken on cigarettes and alcohol is its not cool all the time but once in awhile why not freeeeeeeeee countryyyyyyyyy ayyyyyy.

Welp, bye 🙂

superficial 🤔

Sometimes it feels like people keep getting more and more shallow as time goes on which I don’t roll with. It’s like nobody genuinely cares and if  they do you gotta hold on to them tightly in case they all the sudden decide you’re a waste of their time. What a superficial messed up world we live in where all that matters is how you look, how big your ass is, whether or not you’re willing to send sketchy pictures. Nobody takes a moment to step back and realize that superficial things such as these will not matter when we are older.

What’s going to matter is whether or not you have someone to be with till the end whether that’s a significant other, a best friend, a beautiful baby sister who if anyone hurt you would murder (psssh never too specific). It’s not gonna matter if you have a sexy beast for a hubby or wifey cause they’re most likely not gonna be loyal to you anyways in the long run if you think about it.

I don’t understand why people don’t understand this. I don’t understand why I can’t have genuine conversation with a guy without them asking for a nude in .5 seconds. I’m not saying all you guys act like this of course because that wouldn’t be true. My best friend is the most genuine guy ever and I think that whoever dates him is the most lucky person in the whole Milky Way. I love him with all my heart. Um I’m searching for real people to talk to not guys who want nothing but sexual favors, you feel? Not only are guys like this sometimes but also I’ve met some rather shallow girls too.

I was skyping this guy and he heard I got dumped and he just kept saying date me, date me, date me over and over again. I’m sorry buddy but that’s not how this whole thing works.

I feel like it’s all just one confused bundle of chaos this whole relationship and happiness search. Also got in trouble cause skipped a meeting with a teacher which I literally never got an email about? Ok.

Anyways, I’m closing this off here I’m kind of in French class. Oops.

 

Dear me

Dear me, I know that I don’t always treat you the best. God sometimes I’m really hard on you! I know that sometimes things are not always the best and you have been through so much. You constantly worry about their accusing eyes staring at your arms and face but darling don’t be so harsh on yourself. You coped with things badly, but does that mean you can’t now cope with things in a healthy way? Of course you can cope better. You’ve been clean from that way of coping for months and hopefully will be for the rest of your life. You are not worthless no matter how many people make you feel this way. Every single person in this world is worth something and you are too. You have so much to contribute to this world use your creative voice to do that. Having emotions does not nor will it ever make you weak you can talk to people about what’s going on don’t bottle up. Never ever bottle up your emotions to the point where you’re silently suffering again. Having a big heart makes you all the more strong but please remember please dear god please remember not to put everybody before yourself. Thinking about your own personal health doesn’t make you weak or selfish it just means you are taking care of yourself which is something you should absolutely strive to do. Don’t have so much resentment towards others forgiving someone doesn’t mean you must forget that they wronged you in the first place. You shouldn’t let people stop you from going places just because someone you don’t like will be somewhere doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go. Go in spite of that. There’s a certain extent to everything having said that you must understand that not everybody is here to help you but those that are you must treasure and appreciate because there are plenty of fish in the sea but they are your fish. These type of supportive trustworthy fish only come around once in awhile. Enjoy them. 

Sincerely, me. 

Hi I’m blogging again. 

I had a panic attack in front of my manager but she was kinda cool about it and today she asked if I was doing any better and I kinda was because you know salted caramel core ben and Jerry’s cause screw boys. 

See I say that yet it’s like I already have crushes on people again le sigh oh the joys of being a teenage girl am I right? 

I wonder if any of you are interested  in adding me on social media..hmm..*wink wink nudge nudge* 

Also what is with customers being so damn stupid!? Like no honey YOUR coupon is expired is in NO GO  as in NO WORK NO MORE do they not understand this? It’s not like I can scribble the date out with sharpie and then all the sudden the cash register will accept it uh no not how it works 

Welp bye ❤ 

Things are lookin up 

You know how I have an ex who cheated on me? I unblocked him on everything and we made up. I apologized for being emo trash in tenth grade and he apologized for being an asshole 🙂 

Also I feel now he is more empathetic because he isn’t smoking and drinking anymore like he used to. He is supportive and kind and so fun to talk to and like a super chill friend. I think I just met him and dated him at a low point in his life. I told him about my breakup and he was nice about it and said I can always talk to him about anything. 

Also he sent me a song called as I am by logic. It really lifted my spirits which is weird I usually don’t listen to music like that but you guys if you feel down listen to that song it will literally cheer you up to the extreme 10/10 would listen again. (I did like 50 times now)

Also I’ve had more time now to get my homework done and I’m doing better in school which I think is amazing 🙂 

I hope you all are doing well 

Welp bye. 

I basically got fucked over to the extreme

ok, let’s start with this I got dumped and unadded on all his social media because he thinks I cheated on him and I’m “emotionally abusive” First off I didn’t cheat oh him I just said that a 24 year old stoner tried to ask me out which is the truth. At no point did I say yes to this at all. (The date).

His best friend fucked everything up even more and convinced him that I am emotionally abusive and use my mental issues for attention( I deal with depression and anxiety if you haven’t picked that up by now). What really sucked is he totally listened to her and went along with it. He didn’t talk to me about it at all just unadded me on everything because of false accusations made against me. At the same time I don’t feel that bad because I don’t really want to date a sheep that just listens to what he hears and not both sides of the story, his best friend hates my guts so of course she’s biased as all hell and wanted to fuck me over.

I tried to drop his shit off at his house cause obviously I don’t want it anymore. I rang the doorbell a few times and knocked and his mom called the cops on me for doing that. The cops were like wtf lol why would we get called for this and I was like yeah legit wtf.

Anyways, conclusion I am single and that’s 5 months down the drain I just hope that whoever I date next doesn’t end up being a waste of my time once again.

Welp,bye.

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