Kind of feels like I’m not really sure what to write on here anymore. That wouldn’t be necessarily wrong, but it’s kind of disappointing. I sort of fell off the face of the earth and just stopped writing at all. My eyes have been so incredibly watery all damn day long it’s ridiculous. It just hurts. That’s not really what hurts though. What really hurts is that I try so hard, but I’ll never be good enough for anyone. That’s ridiculous.

-You dress up for other people, but not for me. (Yes, because I feel comfortable around you. I don’t feel like I have to impress you, but I guess I was wrong.)

-You don’t get to tell me what to do. (Ok, but yet you get to tell me what to do?)

You confuse me so much, but I try my best to decipher you. It’s like I am never allowed to be down when I’m with you which is stupid because everyone has a bad day once in awhile, but you expect me to always have a perfect mood. I’m not allowed to leave if I’m unhappy with the situation either or at least I don’t feel like I can. I owe a lot to you. I don’t want to leave you behind ever so I’ll do what it takes to make you stick around. Whether that means faking happiness or doing everything you tell me to.

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